LTNS, huh?

I guess a quick update is in order. Things have been a crazy madhouse around here still. My mental state is diminishing quickly. Fortunately, it hasn't had a bad effect on my eating habits. Well, that and for several days we were down to cleaning out the pantry to eat as we didn't have money to get more food. That's over now, thankfully. I've lost about 7 pounds. Amazing the difference that makes in the fit of your pants. I've been hurting pretty bad lately with my hips so I haven't done a bit of exercise. Not the formal kind anyway, chasing after 3 kids and the various other things that have kept my busy lately are pretty much exercise. I have an appointment with the mental health services soon, so hopefully I can get everything in that dept. back on track. They can also help with the physical part, as I don't qualify for any kind of insurance aid anymore. (Thanks, George, you fucking asshole) And they can also help me get back to school without having to pay for any of it. On a bright note, the Willabeast is completely potty trained!! A good side effect of not having money to buy pull-ups.

New week, new month

I haven't updated in a few days due to being incredibly busy. The oldest two kids came home from their Dad's for a couple of days and then left Sunday for their Mem's house. Nothing special going on with the diet thing yet. I have lost a couple of pounds just from cutting back on the sheer volume of food. I haven't done enough true exercise, but that will come. It is much easier for me to get my exercise when the kids are in school. I am forced (yes, forced. I am NOT a morning person) to get up early, and after dropping them off at school I can go somewhere and go for a walk or come back home and do my Pilates uninterrupted. Or both! It's also easier to eat sensibly as I am much more busy. I went to the grocery store yesterday, and as planned stocked up on healthy stuff. I didn't get as much fruit as I would have liked as most of it was overripe. I'll have to get up early and go to the Farmer's Market and get more. The peaches from Charlie are in their prime this time of the year. MMMMMMMM soo good. I did buy some cookies, but limited them to the very expensive kind. When I buy those, I tend to limit myself to one to prolong the enjoyment. A $5 box of cookies lasts so much longer than a $2 one!

You know it's gonna be a bad day when

you have chicken pot pie for breakfast.
So, yeah, not the greatest day. I am a comfort eater. If I am stressed out, depressed, or even happy I eat. Why can't I be one of those people whose appetite is killed by that kind of stuff???
The rest of the day went as follows: potato wedges, macaroni & cheese, and a new m-azing candy bar. And a C2. Which I love. I normally can't drink diet sodas. And while it's true that this one isn't technically diet, it's better than the real thing. All in all, I suppose what I had today wasn't bad. It isn't generally WHAT I eat, as HOW MUCH OF IT I eat. Most times, all that I ate today would have been in ONE sitting. Add a few more meals like that a day and that's where the weight came back on. I refuse to get stressed out over it in a big way, because I know that will just set me up for more failure. I'll be glad this weekend when all of this stuff is out of the house. When I do my big grocery shopping, I'm not even going to buy junk. If I don't bring it in, I won't eat it. Simple as that. I've just been being incredibly lazy this summer. It's a good thing I never did get into that swimsuit... That's okay. Next summer I will.

Intake 7/27

Bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats Cereal
PB&J Sandwich
Campbell's Blended Vegetable Medley Soup
Grilled Cheese Sandwich
Brisket and Garlic toast
Popsicle
Water, water and more water

I'm a Wimp, I admit it

I walk when I can and I do Pilates daily when I am on the wagon. Pilates for Wimps by Jennifer DeLuca is the best book I have found so far. I love it so much I want to steal it from the library. I am going to have to find my own copy of it. There are many, many other Pilates books and videos out there, but so far this is my fave. I highly recommend it, even for those of you who have tried Pilates before and got your butts kicked. ;)

Today's intake

1 cup plain basmati rice
1 blueberry muffin
1 grilled cheese sandwich (2 slice bread, 1 slice medium cheddar, olive oil spray)
3 Ball Park franks, 2 slices bread
wee tiny box of organic raisins
Popcorn
Water, water, water

Now...I know, I know. NOT the healthiest menu. But it's better that what I have been cramming in my gullet. It's the end of the month and I will be able to go grocery shopping on the first and plan on going back to the healthy buying style. I will get these 30 pounds off. It just torques me (at myself) that I regained over 10 that I had lost and am now almost having to start over.

Conspiracy theory #457

Why is it that when you find something that you really, really like and that you can eat as often as you want relatively guilt-free ALL of the damn stores in your town don't have them in stock???
I'm complaining to the management.

Weigh In

173

Another New Start

I've struggled with health and weight loss issues all of my life. This last year, I was finally back on my way to being healthy and I find that I've backslid yet again.
It's easier for me to lose weight if I have to hold myself accountable in small ways. Weigh-ins, measurements, food diary, etc. I can't afford to pay to be in a group, so I have to find ways to be my own support group.
That is to be the purpose of this blog. My own record of progress. I doubt very seriously that any of you who stumble across this little journal will have any interest in it, but I can always use some moral support and encouraging words.